There are many different kinds of lemons. You have the common Eureka and Lisbon. Yen Ben has low seed count, the Pink Lemon well, is pink, the Asian yuzu and of course my favorite, the Meyer is a crossbreed of lemon and mandarin. But when life wants to give you those lemons, essential life just wants you to suck it.
And my god is it bitter.
And this Bitter Chick has been recently given numerous cases of lemons and has no want to make lemonade.
So my story begins. Youngest. An aspiring pastry chef in the city of Chicago, who loves five things most in life. One. Pastries. Two. Pork. Three. Good Beer. Four. Shopping. Five. Well, my mom reads this so we shall stop at four.
With that said, there are two things that scare ALL pastry chefs. One. Vegans. Two. Diabetes.
Has this Bitter Chick traded her Michael Kors for Birkenstocks and her knives for a hacky sack? Goodness no. But, I currently have been tested for diabetes.
MY initial response went something to the tone “What the….”
I’m in my mid to late twenties, thin, active, and have absolutely no family history of the disease. But apparently, diabetes fears no family legacy and claims any at will. Granted, many live long healthy lives with this incurable condition. Granted, with the help of my friends and family I know that if the hand is not in my favor, I will prevail.
I suppose I can only laugh at this ironic turn of events. As I sat there and had the doctor explain to me the tests and what exactly they were looking for, I made a decision. Regardless if I have diabetes or not, I will continue to make the best pastries I am capable of creating. I will learn moderation and NOT eat the entire log of perfectly made foie torchon with house made apricot mustardo. I will not give up my dream of eventually having my own shop nor hinder myself from dining out. (Perhaps I will limit myself to going to Alinea once a year…not twice in one month) I will not allow some silly glucose deficiency control my life nor hinder what is destiny! Vive la pastry, vive la Bitter Chick!!
Perhaps it was an epiphany, or maybe I was just lightheaded and slightly delusional due to them taking four vials of my blood….
Regardless, a lesson today was learned; and the results still not known. My love of food will not be shaken. Now give me that damn lemon. I’m going to make lemon bars.
-Youngest
Lemon Bars:
(Recipes compliments from the one and only Emily Luchetti who I had the privledge to work for at Farallon in San Francisco)
Yield: 24 bars
Crust:
1.5 cups all-purpose flour
.5-cup confectioner’s sugar
6 oz unsalted butter
Filling:
6 eggs
3 cups sugar
1 cup + 2T fresh lemon juice
.5-cup all-purpose flour
Method:
For the crust:
Preheat oven to 325F. Place confectioners sugar and all purpose flour in a mixing bowl with the paddle attachment and beat on low speed. Add the butter and continue to mix until the butter is the size of small pea, about 30 seconds. The mixture will be very dry. Gently press the mixture evenly onto the bottom of a 9X13 inch baking pan. Bake until golden brown, 20-25 minutes, then allow to cool to room temperature. Reduce the oven to 300F.
For the filling:
Whisk eggs and sugar till smooth. Add lemon juice and then the flour. Pour the filling on top of crust. Bake till set. Place I refrigerator for 1 hour. Cut into squares and dust with powdered sugar.
With the holidays approaching at a rapid speed, usually one thinks of family time, turkey, traveling, Black Friday, that creepy uncle that always hugs you a little too long….
Because I work that day, I will be serving an ungodly amount of food, mostly pie to the masses attending my hotel. Seeing the pure gluttony of Thanksgiving has somewhat jaded me about my favorite holiday and I still have yet to recover from last years experience. I still can’t look at Pumpkin pie the same anymore; post traumatic disorder doesn’t even cover it.
Regardless if I wont be stuffing my face with endless amounts of duck fat rosemary rubbed turkey, cranberry star anise orange compote or skillet cornbread, I do feel that I have things to thankful for this past year.
So here it goes.
The Twenty Things this Bitter Chick is Thankful For:
20. Aioli. The perfect companion to fries. Ketchup never stood a chance.
19. Smores cupcake at Molly’s Cupcake. Sitting on the swing.
18. Grilled Cheese Bacon Sandwich at Foor Moons with Sparky bringing me my Blue Moon.
17. Lost in Translation at The Drawing Room. A delicate Yuzu cocktail and an adorable Charles Joly making it.
16. Buenos Aires and their Havana Chocolate Treats in which I filled my suitcase up with when I departed.
15. Monday night Swirls with The Puerto Rican Princess.
14. Vive la Frenchie screaming “no titties” when I make macarons.
13. Alinea’s bacon nougat and to Chef de Cuisine Dave Beran’s ability to deal with Princess Katina’s friends.
12. Katina (my moral compass), Dom, and Pizza
11. The Bristol Boys and their fine establishment
10. Chef Norman Love and his static application on chocolate
9. Our new oven in our shop and The Good German who believes in his staff and bought it for us.
8. Mango Rice Cake at Urban Belly
7. Schwa- for beating out WD-50 and giving me a great story to tell. (To the best worst meal ever)
6. Olivia’s beef carpaccio and of course, Chef Morgan “Dish” Angelone at the helm.
5. My staff that has stuck it out this year with all the changes and challenges- you know who you are and lets keep it up.
4. My 20” wedding cake cutting knife I found at Midwest Cutlery. Buttercream has met its match.
3. Chef Celine Plano. She saved my life and pastry soul this year. Hands down.
2. Homemade Biscuits on Mica’s deck with my roommates. (grated frozen butter into the dry mix…pure flaky genius)
1. Eldest
I have been considered to be a competitive person; I don’t necessarily agree. But then upon reflection, I have been known to say “In it to win it.”
My three partners in crime had decided that we had gone too long without a night out. So, The Puerto Rican, The Grecian, The White Girl, and myself set a date.
Where was this absurd quartet outing to take place? None other than one of the most respected and outstanding restaurants this side of the Mississippi.
Alinea.
24 courses. Wine Pairings. Pre-game cocktails. In heels.
The winner. Gets a pony.
These ladies were going to be difficult to beat. They were true competitors; well despite the Puerto Rican. She only weighed in at 102.
I can’t remember the last time I actually sat down and had more than five courses. That and I hadn’t seen the inside of my gym in three weeks…ok, dammit six. And then there was the dress and heels part. Fine, give me a pair of sweatpants, my couch; Game Time. But no, not only did I have to dress well, I had to behave well. We all had friends that worked there and made us swear we would be on out best behavior as they pleaded, “PLEASE, go to Schwa! Anywhere but here!”
To prepare for the evening I visited my local Banana Republic and favorite gay personal shopper. We planned to look great, but also made a conscious effort to pick an outfit that could fit what my ladies and me call our “food babies.” Next up, Neiman Marcus for NARS makeover. Unfortunately for me, my regular girl was off so I made the dumb idea to try another. One hour later, I looked like a raccoon or a Russian hooker (the results from the poll are not yet in, and no offense to Russian hookers but they do love their black liner!) and quickly hurried home to scrub my face off.
The night started with Krug and cheers to one of the most memorable evenings of 2009. Well, we hoped to remember it.
Honestly. After working in fine dining for years, I don’t care to have endless courses, snobby service, and high price tag experiences. Alinea is none of these- perhaps not the price tag. But, well worth it.
Dave Beran, the Chef de Cuisine, is remarkably talented. The food was fun, beautiful and MOST importantly, flavor forward and balanced. Our wonderfully attentive Captain, Colleen, made sure that we received everything perfectly and timely. Last but not least, Richard, our sommelier who beckons the spirit of Edward Scissorhands sans scissorhands, was informative and a perfect gentleman. (Despite calling me a light weight. I suppose I shall forgive him.)
The highlights: (a.k.a. things that were badass)
Pork Belly with Thai Distillation
White Truffles with Scrambled eggs, and risotto, and mashed potatoes, and taglitelle.
Dried Spicy Peanut Butter
Matsuake with Toro
Hot potato Cold Potato
Bubble Gum in a tube (don’t mind the noise… and Grecian Princess screaming to Puerto Rican Princess “You have to suck harder” as the dining room went quiet.)
Chocolate with BACON NOUGAT. (In caps because it was the most amazing thing I have EVER had….still waiting on the recipe from Sir Beran.)
My appreciation for the individuals that work so diligently at Alinea is endless and the experience that they provide is truly astonishing. Complements to the Chef and a warm thank you to the service staff.
But allow me to get to what is most important.
Who won the pony?!
In brief, after a four-hour dinner, numerous drinks at other fine establishments and back to Alinea to have after shift drinks (or bottles) with their crew; at 5am my little Grecian took the prize.
We are so very proud of her.
-Youngest
[The topic of this article was initiated by the Youngest in order to instigate the Eldest to finish it off. And that, she did. Thanks, Yo.]
- The Eldest
Over the years I have acquired quite a cookbook collection. Perhaps that is an understatement.
Correction. A cookbook library.
These are not just merely for decoration, or to have for random references to pull out on game night. These beautifully bound pages chronicle different styles, techniques, moments of my journey through Pastryland. Each one offers a friendship and hope that help me through creative block moments. As each page unfolds my eyes grow wider. New inspiration unleashes itself and an idea is born.
I can admit that I went through what I would like to call my “snobby” phase. Only fine dining cookbooks would suffice my urges and of course all the Pierre Herme collection. Then there was the “informational” phase; the one stop scientific shopping, Harlod McGee’s On Food and Cooking and The Sweet Kitchen. Vintage was in and Maida Heatter was all the rage. Books over $250 was a brief addiction but due to the lack of funds a quick kick in Martha Stewart and then a right hook into everything Spanish. The green monster, Ramon Morato’s Chocolate, as I call it, still leaves me breathless and bursting with creative fruit flavor.
But overall, the book that I at times crawl into bed with and slowly turn the pages of after a hard service or a fight with a friend…
The Last Course by Claudia Flemming. She is my Judy Bloom.
I will never forget the day I came across her book. I was living in Boston and was cruising the cookbook section of Borders. Basically, the porn isle for chefs.
A simply cover with three miniature pictures on front. A delicate blueberry tart, perfectly caramelized pineapple, and a mouth watering waffle. Perfect. Delicate. Simple. The book fit perfectly in my hand and all the way to the register.
Claudia Flemming, the former pastry chef of Gramercy Tavern, is an inspiration to me. Sure doesn’t use fancy hydro-collides, or use high-tec equipment. She uses the basic knowledge of good pastries, great products and gracious execution as her guide. But more importantly, for me at least, is that this book reached out to me and made me realize pastries could be simple and sexy. After working in ultra-fine dining you think a completed plate has fifteen components, when really it could just have one and be just as mind blowing. From her chestnut honey Madelines to the salted caramel chocolate tart all to her goat cheesecake, this book consistently provides foolproof recipes that any cook, professional or home, would be proud to create.
So, I leave you with a recipe from Mrs. Flemming. Jot it down, save it for later. But I promise you will be pleasantly surprised at the pure brilliance of her work.
You can thank me later.
-Youngest
Lavender Lemon Pound Cake:
1cup butter
4T dried lavender
5 eggs
1.5 cup sugar
1.5 cup + 2T cake flour
¼ t salt
1T lemon zest- grated
1t vanilla extract
¼ cup lemon juice
Method:
Preheat the oven to 350F. Butter and flour a 9X5 loaf pan. Melt 1T of butter and steep the dried lavender with it for 10 minutes. Strain and cool.
With the whisk attachment- whisk the eggs and 1 cup sugar until thick and pale.
Sift the flour and salt. Fold the lemon zest and a third of the flour into the egg mixture till combined. Fold the rest of the flour in two batches. With one cup of the batter whisk with the melted butter and vanilla extract. Pour back and mix into the original batter. Pour the batter into the prepared pan. Bake the cake until tester comes out clean. Meanwhile, combine ½ cup sugar, lemon juice, and ¼ cup water to a simmer. When the cake comes out of the oven brush the lemon juice mixture on top, when slightly cooled take the loaf out and brush again (top and bottom) with the lemon glaze.
